update #3...

OH

MY

GOD!!!

my life totally sucks!

i know i should be totally relieved, but i prepared myself for a week for this biposy...
i psyched myself out so i wouldn't be terrified...i got mad at jackson because he didn't volunteer to go with me...i took a day off work...

i get there, the tech does the ultrasound, and says, "i don't think there's anything there...let me show this to the radiologist and see what he thinks..." {keep in mind that i TOLD her it was easier to find/feel when i was sitting up, yet she did the ultrasound laying down}

so...30 minutes later, the radiologist comes in, and looks at the ultrasound
he thinks it's nothing...
so I DIDN'T HAVE A BIOPSY!

so i went home and bawled...for a long time
UUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i know i should be thankful {and i am}, and relieved {and i am}, but i was soooo frustrated!

i feel like i was totally dismissed...all i kept hearing was "at your age...well, you're so young...IT'S NOTHING!"

i've never been convinced that it's cancer or that i'm dying...but i KNOW it's not nothing, and i just want someone to tell me WHAT IT IS!!!!